My FYP

This blog came across my mind just now and I kinda read back all of the posts. I actually feel like this place was the best platform to record the thoughts and moments that were extremely important to me or at least I thought they were in my life. [And I think I shall continue record them until I find a better place to rant things about hahaha]


It's the time of my uni life that I have to start doing my final year thesis *a research paper*. I suppose this should be one of the most important stuffs I should focus on right now but deciding on the topic has become one of the hardest part of the whole thing. I don't know what topics are beyond my level or what could actually allow me to graduate easily. I pretty sure this is one of the highlights of my uni so I decided to blog it.


Let's hope things go well and have a nice day if you are reading this:) *lowkey thinking no one else but me will read this but you know just in case there is someone cares about me hahaha*


Not sure how my future self will be thinking while reading this but yeah just so you (my future self) know I am struggling right now so you could live a better life you lazy ass. I hope you are still grateful for everything and already is the person I wish I'd become.

What's life

Not sure if this is a part of growing up or it is just a coincident, I had been waking up to a lot of bad news for the past few days. I have been told that we can never predict the next second but this sentence has been in my brain since the day the first bad news struck me.

Not to be super cheesy or super deep, I didn't know that news would actually hit me that hard, I didn't know it would change the way I see the world. 

Let's be grateful for literally everything!!!  

人生就像蒲公英，看似自由，却身不由己。

Garbage can

Here seems like the perfect place to pour out my negativity so I'm really sorry if by any chances, I bring negativity to your day.

So apparently September is not a good month for me. Although I understand the fact that we must have ups and downs in our life bla bla bla, I still can't really get through these downs. 

Maybe it is a part of growing up, to face the problems myself and put a smile on my face no matter how bad I feel from the inside. 

Understanding the fact that telling my problem to someone could somehow help, but I don't get why this time I just don't feel like telling anyone. *maybe it was because I'm officially a grown-up now hahah just kidding*

Thank those who have brought a smile on my face. *bow and hug*

"Even you're a trash, you have to believe in yourself. It's called garbage can, not garbage cannot."

Fighting everyone. 

Dream came true

I went to BIGBANG's MADE in Malaysia concert that I have been dreaming of for the past few years. Never had I ever thought this dream could come true so quickly, however, seeing their faces and hearing their voices in real life were so unrealistic. 

I mean even until now I still can't believe that I ACTUALLY SAW THEM LAST NIGHT. It was probably because I have seen them through screen so many times. I still remember I actually mentioned how much I love their live 'Fantastic Baby' on MAMA2013 here. Words really cannot describe how unbelievable last night was.

Before VS after the concert hahah we look like we enjoyed way too much,

Unlike last time, the withdrawal syndrome is not that bad maybe that is because today is just the first day after the concert. 

They sounded exactly the same or maybe much more better live and I'm neither lying nor exaggerating  

Everything was too perfect yesterday!!!!!


Although GD looked pretty tired, he was still super charismatic. I think I have probably fallen in love with 5 guys all at once, they are indeed the five of the most talented people on Earth. 
TOP and Seungri look specially attractive and hot in real life 

Knowing that their next comeback would be in more than 7 years from now due to NS, I feel very upset 'cause it means that I wont be seeing 5 of them together on stage any time sooner. Not sure if I could still be as passionate as I am now in the future haha.

See how bigbang got us

Post Concert Withdrawal Syndrome

Do not judge the content of the post by its title hahhaha because I am not going to talk about anything related to mental or physical health. So don't you worry. The reason why I wanted to write this post was because I want to write my feeling down right now so I could always flash back to this feeling even after 10 years' time.

Last Sunday I went to The Script's No Sound Without Silence concert with Alyson, my friend who was ffk (fong fei kei) by her brother last minute. So she asked me whether I wanted to go for their concert. I admit that I kind of did not want to go in the first place because I was broke and I was not even a fan *keyword, WAS* of them. 
And then my friend suggested to go there almost 10 hours before the concert started so that we could stand as close to the stage as possible. And then I was like since I have already paid for the ticket why not I just make it worth the price. The moment when I heard them sound checking I knew that I did not make the wrong choice. *they did their sound checking for so many times and I was happy like a goat haha I knew that doesn't make any sense*

What else could we do while waiting for the concert.

Let me just skip to the concert part, IT WAS OVERWHELMINGLY FANTASTIC.
"Sometimes words just ain't enough for this concert that was more than concert."
Although the venue was lousy but what really matters was the person who performed, I did have lots of fun that night. I screamed throughout the whole concert. And the best part was, I somehow managed to make few eye contacts with Danny and Mark (at least I believe I did haha)
"

I strongly believe that he was pointing at me. This is not a zoomed in picture and yes I was this close to them for the whole night. 

"Take that rage, put it on a page. Take that page on the stage, blow the roof off the place."
Ever since that night, I am madly, crazily and completely in love with them. I have been missing them since that night and their songs have never got out from my brain yet as if they are still singing beside me. I have been listening to their songs all the time. When I say all the time, I mean all the freaking time. I know this could sound super crazy to anyone, even maybe to my future self but nobody cares.

This withdrawal syndrome is real and how am I supposed to get over it when Danny touched my hand twice haha. And not to mention, this was my first concert and I am so glad that I went. Thanks Alyson for everything, I really could not thank you more for this amazing experience.

Kindly forgive my after-hours-of waiting,-standing-and-screaming-pale face

"We'll remember this night when we are old and grey 'cause in the future these will be the good ol' days."

the most meaningless post ever

Apparently [It's been a while] is my typical intro so today I am not gonna skip this tradition. 

I do remember I named this blog sunshine was because I thought I could be positive everyday like the sun.

Life just kicked my ass and told me:"WHAT A NAIVE THOUGHT PEIRU BUT GOOD TRY ."

The sun of my life did not shine today

I am misspending my study week as holiday week as usual haha should I change my blog name to "The confession of a procrastinator"?? 

It's the thing about me. I always over think stuffs whenever I have free time.

Obviously there are something happened and I always have the same issue on different people. Maybe it's my problem duhh god knows why

"I'm not like them," they said.

I can't love people in the same way I used to love 'cause I'm afraid I will get hurt in the same way I used to get.

  

gap year

I've been convincing myself take a gap year to kind of discover what I want to study in the future
Like other teens I'm totally lost.
Taking gap year is actually not the stuff that Asians usually do as we consider it as wasting time but for me bacsially I've missed the application period so I was thinking why not I just let it be since I always believe that GOD DECIDES THE BEST
Okay I shall stop being too religious here
However I kinda scare that I will slack at home for a year time without doing anything because that is usually I will do hahah

For those who are considering take gap year I'm here to encourage you come on you only young once
Here's some link that might be helpful
Mind the Gaps
Should your child have a ‘gap year’ before college?
Okay I admit that I hope there's somebody support me to do it muhahaha
I was super depressed for the past week and I feel so sorry to those friends whom I annoyed
Duhhh I know y'all love me so you guys don't mind right:)
Speaking of friends and buddies actually thank you so much for the encouragements and advice I seriously cannot live without people's advice
in another words I cannot make any decision on my own I know I said this for a million times

Trial is striking me in a week time and I'm now posting stuff yes I'm a typical internet kid
but final is coming too which means I gonna disappear whole a whole month
Good luck for every single A2 student let's work the hardest and be the best batch ever